" Top Ten Reasons Why Gort hates Humans & Wants Them Exterminated . "

10)Charging extraneously high prices for energy originating from the fossil remains of a species that perished eons ago & never did humans any harm . 9)Making billionaires of CEO's after they ran companies & corporations into the ground , costing countless middleclass & lowerclass humans their jobs & livelyhoods.. and paying them even more to " get lost . " 8)Humans who whine about not enough foam , too much foam , too little sweetener or too much sweetener in their beverages & then attempt to pay using a starbucks card that has mere pennies left in the account . ( Those barrista humans work their asses off, for no appreciation & minute wages ! ) 7)dancing , iceskating or living situations involving human celebrities whos careers are deader than trilobites . 6) Marcia Cross , snatching an apron away from an employee @ " Scavo's " pizzeria & claiming she knows how to make " three cheese pizza" . In fact , I shall make transforming myself into a swarm of nano - locusts & eradicating the set & cast of " Desperate Housewives " a priority , before destroying the rest of humanity . 5)Humans who check their e- mail via their cell phones @ " AA " meetings , while another human is " sharing ". 4)Humans who leave their turn signals on without executing their intention of turning . 3)Humans who fail to signal and turn anyway . 2)Humans who leave pets in any vehicle ( including interplanetary spacecraft ) with the windows rolled up , who claim " I'll just be a minute . " ( Klaatu .. that means you too . Sheesh ! ) 1)And the number one reason ... not cleaning up after civilizations on the precipice of self annihilation after deeming them worth saving . I mean Jesus Christ.. radioactive waste doesn't just clean itself up . And it has a half - life of centuries ! Come on ! - Nexus 6

" The Day The Blog Stood Still "

As a " non - moviegoer " , every once in a while I breakdown & feed the entertainment machine my $8.50, so I can checkout of reality on occasion & have something current to chat about ( besides politics , sex , or skimpy lingerie ) with my girlfriend Jessica &/or patrons & my fellow wandering kooks who are waiting in line at Starbucks for our morning java fix . ( That may or may not exclude the skimpy lingerie.) I couldn't resist going to see " Day The Earth Stood Still " being such an avid fan of the original film , directed by Robert Wise & brilliantly acted by Micheal Rennie & Patricia O' Neil . In 2008 , Klaatu is portrayed bereft of emotion or humor by Keanu Reeves , with Jennifer Connelly as the Patricia O'Neil counterpart. Most similarities between the original & the remake end after Klaatu enters Earths atmosphere . In the remake , Klaatu is born on Earth , arriving encased within an organic embryonic spacesuit. Gone are the subtle xenophobic parallels & " stranger in our midst " classic , dramatic metaphors . In todays vision , Klaatu is an enemy who must be destroyed before he does the same to us , according to present doctorine.There is also a nuance of socialism & " egalitarianistic retaliation " as a method of combat; instead of engaging the military directly with its immense stature , GORT chooses to separate itself into billions of microbots composing a collective serving the will of one entity ...a destructive , infrastructure dissolving, decay inducing swarm that eats away any solid matter on the surface & throughout in mere moments. Allegorically, Klaatu represents marxism at its most extreme , with GORT as the ultimate means to exercise his opinions and / or solutions in the political & geophysical sense . In the original film , Klaatu was empathetic while visiting a military cemetary with Bobby , Patricia O' Neils son who explained why so many died in wars . In the new version , Klaatu is unmoved as the child is distraught & upset at his reluctance to reanimate his dead father , in spite of having godlike powers over life & death . " Nothing is ever wasted , even in death . It is merely transformed ... " Klaatu explains . The scene where Klaatu meets professor Barnheart is true to the original , complete with chalkboard covered with advanced equations, & Klaatu correcting and making adjustments to the professors calculations , segueing to their discussion of the fate of mankind . " Once we stand at the precipice of destruction , we are capable of change. " is seed the professor plants ,with hopes it will change Klaatus plan. ( Instead of Sam Yaffa , we get John Cleese .. great casting ! ) The best part of " DTESS" is without a doubt , the new GORT . No actor in an oversized silvery diving suit for us ..in 2008 GORT is a gargantuan CGI masterpiece , with an oscillating ,neon cyclopean " eye " . Along with the ability to render any and all weapons & machinery useless & ineffectual , GORT is also capable of transforming itself into a swarm of" nano- locusts" , that devour and disintegrate anything inorganic or man - made . To me , the biggest disappointment was the absence of the monologue Micheal Rennie made , just before his departure from Earth . Without it , " DTESS" felt like an unmade bed , but with todays sets & lavish effects perhaps it is an unmade bed in an emperors palacial estate bedroom . - Nexus 6

" Millenium " comic

So after a late night of " karaoke" , I got the twisted idea ( as if inebriated people singing popular music isn't twisted enough ...) to try out " Millenium " as a graphic novel . I altered the title to " Project : Gate " since the novel is pretty much built around the " time tunnel " idea , and people who've read it would know what it was anyway , without repeating the title .( Just to add a new twist . ) Maybe a side story within the original could be added , concerning the " centurions " that were snatched when the opportunity presented itself . ( I can just imagine Louise argueing with Julius Caesar , who decides instead of leading his legions across the Rubicon & starting a civil war in 49 BC he wants to own a salon and be a hairstylist . " Caesers Supercuts " ) Anyhoo , here is my cover blurb . Enjoy . (Someone post something dammit .. I'll even throw in some coupons for that crappy chicken sandwich with phoney grill marks from Carls Jr . ) - Nexus 6

Flying Cars

As promised .. "Meet George Jetson .. " flying cars.To the left, is a picture of Paul Mollers design for " The Skycar " which uses four enclosed turbofan engines & has a ceiling yet to be determined (tethered test flights only so far ... however , I believe untethered flights have also been achieved & documented .)The idea is that the " Skycar" flies a preprogrammed flight plan( or autopilot ) so the public can avoid lane darting situations in the air , like we have on the 5 fwy at rush hour . (Air collisions on the way home from work ? Hope you have gieco.) Ain't the future excitin' ? ( I can already hear the chorus from Donald Fagan's " International Geophysical Year " ; " What a beautiful world this will be .. what a glorious time to be freee.." ) Here is a sketch I did after an X - men style nightmare . My version doesn't fly , so much as hover at low altitude . It has a ceiling of 25 or so ft. ( high enough to go OVER a stoplight that takes too long ) and would require a single helicopter turbine ( like Andy Granatelli used in his 1967 car that almost won the indy 500, & Ray Heppenstalls Howmet texas Turbine car , that ACTUALLY won a race .)Also , my version could operate with a multi spark discharge layout to produce or add to its existing fuel , which I hope would be hydrogen. It would have enclosed horizontal turbofans & adjustable ducting (* reaction jets - like a harrier ) all ran via a planetary gear / differential arrangment to control yaw , pitch and attitude .The " FCX" ( ok , having some fun here - flying car prototype ? ) would also feature a steering wheel that functions as a yoke ,similar to an aircraft yet drives like a car . I chose to render it like a cross between the Mach 5 and an Audi R8 . Hmmm .. the future has a silver lining ? ( zoinks .. next thing yanno well be getting speeding tickets from robocop .. " stay out of trouble . " ) - Nexus 6

Alternative New Comics

People who know me , usually find me at "Starbucks".( Commercial ? yes . Gorgeous women who love java ? ABSOFREAKINGLUTELY! ) I'll sit in there, sketching my heart out hoping to catch a glimpse of " Ms Amanda Lee " or her twin , Samantha .If you lived in San Clemente, you would have seen either of these angels , riding a beach cruiser and breaking hearts wherever they go , with their identical visages furtively melting guys into fervent fondue with a mere glance and a lovely smile . Whilst waiting for these tantalizing tarts , I rendered some new characters for possible comics of the not too far - fetched future . " Panic In The Skies " features tough & sensible Capt. Jane Kenworth whos flights are never routine ( laughing .. maybe Capt. Jane is the problem ? Not that I want her to be.. perhaps deep down she's as cynical as I am & thus " shit happens " to her , as I often think it does me. Ya think travellers might ask ahead who the pilot is for their particular flt . & make alternate plans ?Yeah yeah , positive thinking & all that rigamarole.Not everyones going to read " the Secret " & make the universe their own personal atm machine . ) My other idea is a female version of " Dog;Bounty Hunter " complete with 80's poodle coiffure , bandana , shotguns , knives & cool custom V- twins . ( No boring assed SUV's for "Patience McCoy" .. btw , how does she bring back her prisoners ? Dead or alive . Hell , she'll handcuff yer ass to the frame and drag ya , to get paid . No sappy " bro I was there. " Counseling , Patience shoots first & questions later . Maybe Patience needs more patience ? ) Har har . Comments appreciated ,ya " no post ghosts " . - Nexus 6

Next On My Reading List - UBIK - Philip K. Dick

This one is an oldie but a goodie . I actually read it a hundred years ago ( huh ? I'm only 42 ! ) at the time I was young , impetuous and had a short attention span . Now that I'm a jaded cynic , I know it's going to take on a whole new meaning and " life " .Where " Millenium " involved time travel and perhaps parallel dimensions , " UBIK " transcends death itself . Philip is a master of flicking the reality switch , and leaving you wondering if it's on or off . I would love to hear from the " Non - posting phantoms " about this one - Nexus 6

Relationship Query.

What can I say ? I feel differently now . I still love you deeply , Jessica.

" The Testimony Of Louise Baltimore "

"Some 20ths have no more sense of survival than a stalk of broccoli .They'll walk right into a gun . They don't believe death can happen to them , especially the young ones.Then there are their odd political ideas.They are often obsessed with the explanation they 'deserve,'the things they have a ' right ' to, the decent treatment we 'owe' them.Very weird stuff. Me , I'll do anything somebody with a gun tells me to do , and say please and thank you . And kill him instantly if he gives me a chance . " "That's one of the main things we study when we bone up on a culture:what words will shock the hell out of 'em .In the twentieth century it was mostly intercourse and excrement." " Instead of just enriched blood , adrenalin and vitamins- the wake up mixture - we were now getting an insane brew of hyper - drenalin , methedrine , essence of hysteria , TNT , and kickapoo joyjuice . We picked up those half corpses and tossed them around like beanbags. I could have torn sheet metal with my eyebrows. " " Time travel is so dangerous it makes H - bombs seem like perfectly safe gifts for children and imbeciles. "" It was as if my refrigerator had come into Operations, tap dancing and singing 'Suwannee' wearing a sandwich board proclaiming the end of the world. "- The previously mentioned irreverent and sarcastic observations represent a mere segment of the scathing rhetorical muse Louise Baltimore , Chief Of Snatch Operations & time traveling stewardess in John Varleys novel " Millenium ." The film,a mediocre effort,featured Cheryl Ladd as Louise & Kris Kristofferson as NTSB investigator Bill Smith . The plot & mild performances ( which involved snatching people from disasterous cataclysmic events & replacing them with identical,premanufactured dead bodies called " wimps " to prevent paradoxes in the timestream via a wormhole machine called " the gate " .. and this was before the " Stargate " television series & after " Time Tunnel " which I loved )alerted me to the fact that this HAD to be an outstanding novel .. and I wasn't / am not disappointed in the least . I am FLOORED . The level of detail and insight into the workings of the NTSB concerning mid - air collisions & ground impacts involving large airframes is astonishing , as well as the seamless blending of time travel theory, relativity,causality and effect.There is even a new language with terms like " twonky" , " temporal censorship " and " post offices "...a reference to a massive storage complex for time capsules containing bricks or stone tablets bearing messages ( and helpful hints ) from yourself from the future you haven't been to yet , to be opened at an exact date and time ( or the effects can be disasterous .)Seriously .. if H.G. Wells was tylenol, Varley would be the oxycontin or heroin of time travel.(Yeah , I know , that's a stretch metaphorically , but after a few chapters I feel like I need a smoke or a nap , and I don't even smoke anymore.)I started wishing I could remake the movie with Marg Helgenberger as Louise. She has the perfect look for someone who looks like a screen siren frozen in time ( in her " skinsuit " ) who is actually hundreds of years old ( yet perpetually appearing to be thirty .. I can just imagine her grinning in the mirror thinking " smile .. you beautiful fraud , you.. " ) I'd love to hear some ideas on what actor would make a good Bill Smith .. anyone ? - Nexus 6

Montana Wildhack: So it goes .

In Kurt Vonneguts novel " Slaughterhouse Five " a fictional porn starlet was captured by the Tralfamadorains to mate with the main character ( whom was " unstuck in time " ) Billy Pilgrim . Now I do plan to keep this blog a " family show " ( or " R" rated at least .. I promise ? ) but this fantasy stayed with me throughout my youth and well into my middle age. ( I've been at starbucks reading & overheard teenage girls saying things like " gf , he is wicked old .. I mean like 30 ! " , so at 42, I guess I'm Methuselah. ) My last girlfriend was 26 and hotter than the barrel of a Thompsons machine gun during a bank robbery in the roaring 20's .. and she dumped me like a set of bald tires . Nevertheless , my ability to fantasize is still intact , so now and then I exercise that muscle. ( Ok .. get the jokes and metaphors over already .. I'll wait . ( smile ) ) The idea of being held captive by aliens with a sex- kitten from my youth is something I will forever ALWAYS be grateful to Mr Vonnegut , aka Kilgore Trout for conceptualizing . ( You know he was born on the 11th and also died on the 11th , albiet a different month ? interesting .. ) . I'm sure there would be many Scarlett Johansson , Eva Longoria or even a few Teri Hatcher fans ( did anyone know Hatcher had a porn title under her designer belt ? Anyone ? ) and no disrespect to Valerie Perrine, she did have her moments and elegant decolletage .. However MY " Montana Wildhack " and this is my personal choice , would be Alexandria Quinn . Not only is she the MOAB ( Mother Of All Bombs ) of sex sirens , but she goes after her " prey " like a lioness would a wounded or fresh born gazelle . She also has a fun , easygoing personality without a lick of pretentiousness . ( Ha - no pun ! ) Yep .. if there's any Tralfamadorians blogging , please locate and kidnap Alexandria & myself for an indepth study in human mating customs . ( Please ? I'll throw in a lifetime supply of turtlewax with jojobah for spaceships , I promise . ) Nexus 6

Initialize Scan Postings ..

This would be my " emergence from the shadows " dramatic intro . ( Ohh .. can you just imagine " I have the files .. have you the payment I requested ? " ) add to that a corny voice over a la Don Fontaine .. ( In a world .. where nothing is as it seems and fact blends seamlessly with fantasy .. ) ok ok , you get the idea . So I just finished " Wetware " ; Craig Nova . For the uninformed , Mr. Nova is a university professor & an accomplished author . His writing style is lush , effective , enticing and very descriptive , i.e.; " She continued to play . Jack looked out the window. The shadows of the birds flitted around the room ,across the wall, over her hair and hands , through the sounds that lingered in the dusty air . The bits of dust turned in the light and flashed now and then , just small flecks of gold in the otherwise dreary room , but which seemed to suggest the ephemeral and piercing quality of the notes she played . She stopped . The sound of Stone's weeping filled the room . " Now mind you , that was just a light example of how descriptive Craig is . I did love this novel ( and told him so , via e - mail & blogging - no response as of yet .. ) however , I wrote him before I finished the novel . ( Sue me , I was too excited and ensconced in the literature . ) The ending ? Ok .. what do " Easy Rider ", "Dirty Mary , Crazy Larry" & " Thelma & Louise " as examples of films have in common ? ( apples & oranges , films & literature , bear with me .) I love all of those movies and pretty much anything counter culture that kicks ass while thumbing its nose at any establishment , but they all have those " brick wall , didn't see that coming " type conclusions that leave you sitting there while the credits roll with your head tilted askew like a rottweiler that just lost its tennisball under the couch .. or cats watching ping pong .The last few pages of " Wetware " I was all " Wha ?? huhn ? " ( imagine Scooby Doo saying that .. or Astro . Rastro ? ) Again ... it was a marvelous read . Craig drew me in with austere , yet luxurious phrasing and eloquent detailing , then he sneaks up on you with a two by four & whacks you " upside de head " , wiping his hands on his shirt like a butcher with a stained apron punching out after a long shift . Zoinks ! Nevertheless , it's worth reading . Just watch out for that speeding train while you sit in the back seat of a dodge charger ( with Peter Fonda at the wheel & a giggling Susan George riding shotgun ) thinking " Yeeaah ! We made it ! " - Nexus 6

The Android Press